Surrender in Grief: Giving God What You Don’t Understand
8/29/20255 min read
Finding Hope Together
Real Talk. Real Grace.
Welcome!
As a new widow, I've found that God is a true Father, a faithful Friend, and a deep Comforter. As I've learned to navigate this journey with grace, I've found things that are helpful, practical, and inspiring. That's what I want to pass along to you!
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Surrender in Grief:
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Surrender...what is it?
Grief has a way of bringing us to our knees. It strips away the illusion of control and leaves us face to face with questions we can’t answer and pain we can’t resolve. In those moments, surrender might feel like the only option left—but what does surrender in grief really mean?
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Surrender is sacred...
It’s important to begin by clarifying what surrender is not. Surrender is not giving up. It’s not waving a white flag and resigning yourself to despair. It’s not putting on a brave face, pretending the ache doesn’t exist, or forcing yourself to smile when your heart feels shattered.
Surrender is far more sacred than that.
Surrender is trust...
Surrender is opening your hands when everything in you wants to hold on tight. It’s taking the questions, the anger, and the “why’s” that may never be answered on this side of heaven—and placing them into God’s care. It’s admitting, “Lord, I don’t understand,” and then whispering through tears, “But I trust You anyway.”
In grief, surrender looks like giving Him the sleepless nights when your pillow is soaked with tears.
It looks like giving Him the mornings when getting out of bed feels impossible.
It looks like offering Him the moments when your heart cries out, How could life be this way?
And here’s the beautiful paradox: surrender doesn’t make you weaker. In fact, surrender shifts the weight from your shoulders to His. It’s resting in the only One strong enough to carry what is too heavy for you.
Free Download: 10 Scripture Cards for the Brokenhearted
I’ve created a set of 10 beautifully designed Scripture cards you can print and keep on your nightstand, in your Bible, or even on your mirror. Each card is a gentle reminder of God’s presence and promises when grief feels heavy.
Fill out the form here to get your free printable Scripture cards.
Keep them close. Pray them often. Let them speak life into your heart.
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Surrender is peace...
God does not ask you to have it all figured out. He does not demand an explanation from you, nor does He require you to silence the deep ache of your soul. Instead, He invites you to place what you cannot carry into His hands.
And in that place of surrender, something incredible happens.
His peace begins to slip in, quietly and gently, even when circumstances remain unchanged. His presence fills the cracks of your brokenness, like light streaming through shattered glass. His love steadies your heart, reminding you that you are not alone, even in the valley of shadows.
The prophet Isaiah wrote of a Savior who was “a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). Jesus Himself knows the weight of sorrow. He understands the crushing pain of loss and the unanswered “why’s.” When you surrender your grief to Him, you are surrendering to someone who has walked the path of suffering and who promises never to leave you in yours.
Surrender is your anchor in the storm
Friend, surrender does not erase the pain, but it anchors you in the truth that pain is not the end of the story. When you let go of what you don’t understand and entrust it to God, you make room for His peace, His presence, and His healing love.
So today, whatever weighs heavy on your heart—whether it’s a memory, a question, or a burden too great to name—open your hands. Let God hold it. And as He holds what you cannot carry, He will also hold you. 🤍
What burden, question, or ache have you been holding onto that you can release into God’s hands today?
Looking for More Encouragement?
If this post encouraged you, you'll find more in my book, Unshakeable in Christ—a 30-day devotional centered on healing through our identity in Christ. Each day features a powerful "I AM" statement rooted in Scripture. It’s written for women who, while navigating life’s hardest seasons, yet cling to their identity in Christ as their firm, unshakeable foundation.
Share Your Story
Have you found comfort in any daily routines? What’s helping you heal? Share in the comments below—I’d love to hear what habits are helping you in this season, and your experience might give hope to someone else.
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FOR THOSE WHO HOPE THERE’S MORE...
Loss may have shifted everything, but you’re still here—which means there’s more ahead. More joy. More purpose. More of His Presence. If you are ready to heal deeply, walk boldly, and live again through the strength only Jesus gives, then Grace After Loss is for you.
With real encouragement, faith-filled resources, and practical steps to help you move forward, you will remember and honor what was while growing into what can be. You were made to live purposefully with grace, even after the storm. Your next chapter can be beautiful. Let’s begin.